Jack Ascii

Things that I want….

• I want a motorcycle, preferably a new Triumph Bonneville or one from the early 70’s.
• I want the guy with the Merrell slip on shoes who uses the handicrapper at work to see a proctologist.
• I want to make a short film.
• I want to make a humidor.
• I want to see B.J. Penn fight George St. Pierre.
• I want Jens Pulver to win and win often.
• I want boxing (here is a step forward) and the Oakland Raiders to become relevant again.
• I want to see Clutch live in Knoxville before the end of the year (September 30, 2008).
• I want a pontoon boat.
• I want a good recorded version of Joy Division’s “Love Will Tear Us Apart”
• I want the Yankees to miss the pennant race.
• I want to see Heath Ledger again as the Joker (sadly, this isn’t going to happen).
• I want to play singles tennis again (I want a new knee).
• I want a big back yard to play in with Turd Ferguson.
• I want Michael Phelps to dominate the Olympics.
• I want to believe in T. Boone Pickens plan to rid our reliance on foreign oil.
• I want to play Halo for a living. 
• I want an Apply iPod Touch with a better keyboard (I don’t own one for this reason. Is the guy who created this piece of crap a nephew of Steve Jobs or something?)
• I want my cat to quit crapping in my neighbors kids sandbox.
• I want to believe in a politician.
• I want a second season of Firefly and a third season of Jericho.
• I want a Ruger Mark III.
• I want new albums from At the Drive In, Sublime, the original Guns N Roses lineup, Nirvana, Sex Pistols, Elliot Smith, Jeff Buckley, and John Bean (Leroy Mercer)
• I want to see Paris and Venice again.
• I want to see Twiggy, the water skiing squirrel, in person.
• I want to meet the girl who messed up Greg Dulli.
• I want to waterski some more.
• I want less stress.
• I want to go to bed……

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